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Ellen and Gluteus Mikesimus had to teach the new Ellen Undie Model how to do his job.  

(Source: everconstant, via un-square)

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Teacher: If you have 10 chocolate cakes and someone asks for 2, how many do you have left?
Me: 10

(Source: megtill, via sunrise-surf)


why doesn’t school teach you actual life skills like how to meet rich businessmen

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